But I'm determined. Plus, I have to survive. And yes, my life is full of so many imperatives. It brings a girl down.

That is why I'm seeking out a job. I want to limit my imperatives and not be as stressed. Having to do anything is dreadful. I want to make a good income. There's so much beauty in that.

I'm looking for anwsers, that's all. I've been a "problem-person" this year. And fuck, my life is up in arms so I can't help it. Graduating, having my best friend die....it's been very confusing. So I'm set in stone to stop having problems and start having solutions. I love solutions.

I have a friend who is a solutions-person. She "gets shit done" as her boyfriend aptly puts. And she's a good role-model for me. I've needed someone to look up to.

So that's life right now. Bills are piling up and the pressure's on and I'm not worried. How is that possible? I was worried at first but I remembered that I'm just impatient. I must always remember that things that I want either come to me immedietly or slowly with consecutive steps.