Suddenly I had to be seamless, soft, and enticing, because I became obsessed with men and their perception of me. Don't know why, it wasn't like I was fucking them.

And here I am today. I noticed I'm sex-obsessed. I spend hours on the internet, most of that looking for guys. How I'm going to fuck around I don't even know. But I want to.

Don't I have like a painting to make or something?

Oh well, I'll leave myself alone. It's no wonder I seek distraction. You probably would too if you went through what I went through. The good news is a lot of people go through a lot.

The lesson here I am groping for. I know I am on my way to understanding the typhoon and what it did for me.

I would like to feel better.