I'm not daunted by the little things in life. And having an investment fall out doesn't matter. Bitches, I am moving to New York and I will own there.

Things run quite differently there. I am looking forward to the social challenges and the heirarchy of rich who keep the common people out. It's all about rapport, not taking things personally, using your voice, and being a fighter.

Other than that I am ready to start my new show which will be held in Union Square next November. The plans I have for it are magical. It will be wonderful, moody, sensual, powerful. I will use my voice and wail beautifully.

And I'm just about done with the collection I began last March. This series is beautiful as well. After months of painting things I found beautiful, I finally understand my motives. The subject is shyness and it permeates throughout. Am I very shy? Maybe just meek.

Yes I am. I am meek. But fuck it, I'm warm.

So one more peice to go and I'm sending off the meek collection out to New York.

Another thing I've thought a lot about is the subject of fear and how beautiful fear is. Fear has been a template for me in which to learn. It is through fear I've found myself, really. But I've learned to let go. All I know is life is beautiful, I am beautiful, and I can do anything. Fear is just a 'thing' and I can learn from it and toss it out.

Artists like me are on earth to spread beauty. We deserve to be beautiful, feel beautiful, and live beautifully. This is why I take care of myself, love myself, do beautiful things, and demand the best for myself, even if it costs a lot.

All of it ties in to a sound mental state. You wake up in a beautiful boudoir in a comfortable bed. You eat a healthy breakfast that is balanced and organic. You work your body out and dress yourself smart. And then you leave your house into your beautiful city and go to the work you enjoy. And then all you do is create and create and create. You surround yourself with things that are beautiful. You don't allow yourself to trip or be stressed. You exist and you have patience for yourself. You be that perfect mother for yourself who is always supportive. You get plenty of rest. All your friends care about you.

And then all of this goodness shows up on your face and pours out of your body when you're making your art.